I missed you all last week. I was making time, taking time, clearing a path, paying attention to details, rising to the occasion, and regaining focus. You all know the drill.
During this time I was reminded that repose is a quality too many undervalue.
When I find myself in a crowded room, be it a fundraiser or dinner party, I'm always drawn to the woman who is incredibly, gracefully, relaxed. She sits still because people are drawn to her. She speaks in a low voice almost as if creating a spell around her.
We have all met her. If it's the first time, she doesn't treat you like a stranger, instead, she listens with responsive eyes and a smile. If you're an old friend, her eyes light up when you tell her how you've been. She cares about your husband, children, parents, and even your dog.
When you walk away from her you feel as if you've been bathed in beautiful warm light. You have. It's the best beauty secret around. It's called repose.
These days I seem to have more harried moments than tranquil ones. I find myself going in so many different directions and often I don't arrive gracefully. One minute I'm hot, the next minute I'm cold and the holidays are right around the corner!
So last week I acted as if I was a woman with repose. I tried not to rush my family in the mornings. I greeted most everyone I met with a warm smile. While I was with friends, I spoke softly, listened attentively and I sincerely thought that every conversation I had with them was the most important thing on my mind today. I looked at my children and my husband in the eyes when they spoke to me and loved on the dog more than I usually do.
You know the saying, "As is the inner, so is the outer." By taking the time today to step outside myself and embrace others, I found serenity within. You should try it and see how different you feel at the end of the day.
That is repose.
Now, don't you just love it when Cindy Crawford or some blogger like me tell you that the real beauty secret in life is finding your inner light? No Shit!
I have done plenty to find my inner light and yes I'm happier, but I still don't look like Cindy Crawford. All I can do is try to have repose and look my best. This is where the fashion part of my post comes in to play.
My mother always told me, keep it simple, go with a classic, and that I don't look good in prints. Ok. I adore this though!
But when I was a young girl my self-confidence in how I looked wasn't based solely on my mother's directive. Remember my Pierre Deux tiny French bikini story?
Most of my fashion sense was based on what was on the cover of Seventeen Magazine and what my girlfriends were wearing.
Our Catholic all-girls prep school uniform had us yearning for free-dress days!
You see, whether we are consciously aware of it or not, we're constantly programmed by the world to be other women, not ourselves.
We're supposed to look like Cindy Crawford and entertain like Martha Stewart.
How women look and how their looks change in the course of their lives is what I'm really referring to.
How do I look?
That is such a loaded question. Instead, I ask myself, how do I feel.
Whether the day calls for a cotton sweater or a silk blouse, I'm at my best when I feel comfortable both inside & out.
That's called self-confidence!
The good news is that a little self-confidence goes a long way. So who needs a huge closet full of clothes?
Ok, I'll be the first to admit that when the seasons change and the September issue shows up it's sometimes impossible to quiet down the wants.
And then I remember fashion fades, only style remains.
Style is an intersection of what you wear and who you are.
Once you learn that less is more, then enough becomes plenty, and your entire outlook on life, including fashion, is transformed.
Fashion is a show-off. Style has seen it all before. Fashion is impatient. Style is steadfast. Fashion guesses. Style knows.
Style begins when you seek and discover your strengths, then bank them for all they're worth.
Many of the beautiful photos above are by Lisa Warninger a Northwest-based photographer, specializing in lifestyle, fashion, and location shooting. Nightingale Photography is where she blogs about her stylish life in Portland.
Fabulous post Lisa. The photographs beautiful...great style...and i totally agree with you, you have to know yourself, be comfortable in your own skin to have style.
ReplyDeleteAnyone with money can buy fashion, but style is the key.
Lisa, I enjoyed this reflective post very much. You nailed it perfectly. We, as young women, are raised to be like others by the desire to fit in. The best thing about aging is finding one's inner self and having confidence. I have never felt better, but know that my "looks" aren't what they used to be. You put it in perspective to focus on how you feel, not how you look. Love that advice. The other day I simply pinned an over sized silk flower to my blue denim shirt...I just was hanging around the house, but that little touch reflected the inner me~and I felt great! And it made my husband smile...he gets it too!
ReplyDeleteJust lovely Lisa! And, a beautiful read to start a perfectly sunny Sunday morning. I'm happy you remind us of repose, and I love the concept of banking all of our strengths. Brava + thank you!! oxo Barbara
ReplyDeleteThis is an extraordinary post... so grounding, inciteful and inspiring. I am so glad to have read this as I needed it! Thank you.
ReplyDeletelisa . . . in the moment . . . love all of this. thank you.
ReplyDeleteLisa, this post really resonated with me. I am starting to do this in a most serious way, reflect, know who I really am (I do) and repose. It is about inner beauty, strengh, and confidence.
ReplyDeletexoxo
Karena
Art by Karena
Gorgeous!
ReplyDeleteAnd the little black dress in image 9 is amazing :)
Lisa,
ReplyDeleteThank you for reminding us to slow down and smell the roses. Such truth in what you say. I wish I had learned this earlier in life, but I was almost 50. Guess that is better than never learning.
Have a great weekend, and thank you for this beautiful message.
Teresa
Very nicely put Lisa... it's the best thing I have read all day. ~Terri
ReplyDeleteWhat a gorgeous and inspirational post! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteWow Lisa - you need to go into the repose mode more often girl, this post is awesome! A lovely friend once told me that the room lights up when I walk in - talk about a confidence booster! I certainly don't feel that way, but his words have etched themselves on my heart. You are so right, we should never underestimate the mighty power of a few beautiful words of encouragement to another human being.
ReplyDeleteMillie ^_^
This is such a thoughtful post, Lisa.
ReplyDeleteI should read it every morning before I start my day. We must be connected somehow (I think you feel that too). I was thinking about my life and my priorities all weekend. Too often I lose perspective. It's so important to remind myself of the people and things that give my life true meaning.
Your post is a gift given at exactly the right time. You exemplify the woman with repose. I feel like you were (and always are) really listening :)
xo
Brooke
Thoroughly thoughtful and "reposed" post - complete with graceful, elegant images and gracious, beautiful musings!
ReplyDeleteAs others have said, what a gorgeous post, and a good one to leave as I run out the door to a cocktail party! These words will stay with me, so, thank you :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Lisa for this beautiful post. I strive for this in my personal life, however, owning a retail store becomes a daily challenge! Today a "lady" came in the store and I said "Hello - how are you today?". She responded "just looking"!!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your wonderful blog and all the hard work you put into it - it is much appreciated.
Nancy
I love this post, and I thank you for it.....
ReplyDeletejoan
Lisa loooove this post!!! So true, I read through it shaking my head in agreement. That said gotta admit in my eyes, I can never have enough beautiful cashmere sweaters, handbags, silk scarves, shoes,etc...you get the picture and truth be told I feel and look my best when I DRESS my best. Go figure. When I think I look good, I shine on the outside, get a little skip to my step, smile a little broader, laugh a little easier.....vain or not, its the truth. And I think in addition to all you said which I totally agree with is in addition to repose it all boils down to being your authentic self, being truly comfortable in your own skin. And despite wanting to lose 18 pounds, I really am happy with who I am.....at last.
ReplyDeletePS-Wondering how I missed this but realized this was put out right as I joined blogland!
ReplyDeleteI do love this post Lisa. So thought provoking and inspirational. I love what you say about style and fashion. Style comes from our center, the core of our being. Beautiful....just like you!
ReplyDeletexoxo
Hi Lisa
ReplyDeleteAlthough I have never met you I know in my heart that you embody everything you have written about in this post! You have a great style that is very apparent.
All the Best
Patricia